This is my confession...

it's horrible to fear the place you once loved,
and to see a street corner you knew so well and be afraid of its shadow.
to see famliar steps but be unable to climb them.
i never understood how people lived with fear.
women afraid to walk home alone,
people afraid of white powder in their mailbox or bombs on buses,
darkness and night,
people afraid of people.

I always believed that fear belonged to other people; weaker people.
it never touched me,
and then it did...
...and when it touches you you know,
that its been there all along,
waiting beneath the surfaces of everything you loved.

your skin crawls,
your heart sickens,
and you look at the person you once were walking down that street
and you wonder...

...will you ever be him again?

The blog welcomes you to my world and more importantly my survival and experiences within this dark world in an attempt to find me; the true me, the happier me that I once was. But it won't be all doom and gloom - through my travels i'll come across lots of muscle boys, pimps, drag queens and so called 'straight boys" and there you'll find the true: Confession of a Muscler!